Reeling in the years...

In the past two weeks, my life has changed, both completely and not at all.

On March 24, I married the man that was too good for even my best dreams. We understand each other completely, which led us to what we realized right from the start: there will never be another.

On my customs declaration, entering Antigua on our honeymoon, I checked the box labeled "married." So far, that's been the only change -- on paper.

Everyone has asked me, in the short time I've been back, if I feel any different, now that I'm a wife. I tell them no, and that is the truth. What's different isn't me -- it's the way I see him.

Every time I catch a glimpse of that shiny gold ring on his left hand, I see a man. I've always viewed Jeremy as being mature, and even wise beyond his years. But for the first time, I look at him now as a grown-up, and he said the same about me.

The thing is, neither of us has changed. We've lived together for so long now, there aren't many surprises for us to tackle.

What has changed isn't even our perceptions of each other. He's still that smart, goofy, loving person I fell in love with, and I'm still that adventurous, admiring girl he always knew.

When I look at him and see a grown-up man, what I'm really seeing is my own grown-up reflection. And it's a little scary. And it's a little wonderful.

It's hard for us to see ourselves as grown-ups, because "grown-up" to us means: "like our parents." We've separated the roles of parent and child for so long, we can't even recognize it when we become one in the same (whether we have kids of our own or not).

I've always objected to those who believe you become a "man" or "woman" after you're married. Marriage, I believe, just shows you the mirror.

I think it's the challenges you go through on your own -- living alone, finding a job/career, struggling to pay rent -- that develop you into an adult. I know I wouldn't be the woman I am without those things. I also know that a child, with no sense of responsibility or ability to self-reflect, has no business entering into the complete partnership that is marriage.

So have things changed? On the surface, sure. But really, truly, we are still the same man and woman we were before. We were just lucky enough to find each other, and to find love, to make our lives more complete.